Science Forums 2

[tmaromine]

Well, I say no, but it really is only your choice...

Here is something I posted on another religious forum:

For me, it started just last August I think(or maybe just any of the 2006 before then, and to now), when I really started to further question things, and put the self-knowledge I've already thought of to logic.

The big part of it, I'd say started the beginning of 2006. I wrote a poem. After my teacher'ad graded it, she commented that I 'have a very deep thought process'. Now this I'm relying on vague memory to say, but I think I "just wrote" that, as if it came to me, and that I didn't think about life as deeply before it. I do know that after that, I've thought some complex – deep – things.

Ever since February '06, I've kept quotes in a document that I've found just "right about life" in one or a few sentences. Some of them I have on my same site as the poem there. Many "quotes" I've thought of myself, and while some others mightn't see them as "big", I know I do; they're important things in life summed in a small amount of words.

Many memories where I look back on myself, I feel less "mature" or less "knowing". Also, I usually look back on many of those memories from a third person view, and not as if it was actually me creating those memories. I feel that before last year, I was "unconscious" to life, and what people are and do. Last summer I had plenty of time to think, and be by myself with my thoughts. Sometimes I would think of something so "deep", that I went into a daydreamish state, and it was very vivid, but seconds later I came back to my ambience and it was harder to think of what I was thinking. I still have thoughts like that sometime; I wish I could make them happen on command.

Before last August, or last summer, I did believe in God, though my family doesn't go to church, and rarely did I ever discuss the topic. I even had in an old screenname's profile of mine "If you believe in God, put this here." About last August, I substantially started to think about where from I came – where and how we came. I think it was about the same time I 'switched'. But many nights I did lay down, about to fall asleep, wondering of God, and how it did feel a little "wrong" thinking about stopping a belief in him, or
"ignoring" him as if he really was the truth, and that I was just denying it. But over time, I've matured more, and understood more.

This year was the year where I really wanted to stop being so "immature", but that really didn't happen. Not too long ago I then realised there there os a difference between "being immature", and "being an immature (person)". So many times, laughter comes from something immature, and that I couldn't get rid of.

Then there are times on clear nights, that I look up out through my window, and see those few stars. Sometimes I get into that daydreamish trance, and I really think about just how far we are from them, and how they are many more that I just can't see. I feel "connected" with those white dots that shine. It's a feeling I can't explain, but it is one where I feel as if "I am nothing; my mind is everything" – kind of. And then there was one night where I had my window open, looking at the rolling clouds over a gleaming moon. It was chilly, with just a bright ball of white peering through and between clouds as they passed. During that moment of chilliness and moon, I sort of felt like that without humans, that is all the universe is, would be, or ever was. 'Black chills...with bright light'. Well, again, not quite. It is all too hard to explain, so I just value that emotion to myself. This doesn't have exactly too much with being atheist, other than that a lot of my thought and emotion was set on it, which made me feel a certain "truthful" way. (By the way, that night with the open window I took many pictures, and a few videos of moving clouds. None of them came out anything near the real beauty; none capture that feeling...)

Quite a few times I get annoyed at religious-believers, and there are other times when I just wish all humans would get along no matter my or your belief. Though rarely do I allow religious belief to be plausible in my mind...

Looking at the 'document of philosophies, I remember why I created it. I wrote 4 paragraph idea, and started the paragraphs with "Life–what is it?". It was a young idea of mine on life, the complex memory of which I still have in my head.... These types of things mightn't mean too much to others, unless they really, really think, but to me, they remind me of ideas that I can't forget for the well-being of my life...

Well, that was a lot, yet I still might not have answered your question. That was background, the reason I guess is: I feel like I can think deeper than many can, and I feel that is why I understand the "truth", and why I think religions were "created". It is all much because of complex thought. Thought that I cannot explain; it's emotional, and very abstract. I'd say the reason for why I don't believe in God is much more complicated than why you do believe in God.


«We all at times feel like we know what's right, but I feel like I know the real right… Though is that just my opinion, or my truth?»

«Age isn't amount of revolutions one'as went around the sun. Age is the amount of thought that has circled one's mind.»

«Knowledge itself isn't finite; the amount willing to be learnt is.»

«Knowing all is nothing; knowing of all is everything.»

«Let not someone teach you; let yourself be taught.»

In my opinion, my view for no God is definitely more complex and "thought-out" than some's view for God... This is definitely just my view though – if you even understand some of it. Keep contemplating ; the answer will find you/you'll find the answer.