I've given inadequate suggestions on this thread. I'm sorry. I'm going to try again. If I repeat myself, that's part of education.
So, some new old rules:
1. Parents: you are the most important educators any child will ever have. You should think of all your time with your children as education. If parents aren't available, responsibility should go to whatever authority figures there are at home. When I say "parents" here, I mean the most responsible adult at home.
2. Parents: you should be involved in schools. My father was always on the school board and my mother organized fund raisers. That was in a rural community. Parents from urban areas might not be able to achieve that level of involvement, but they should never behave as if they couldn't be as involved as my parents were.
3. Schools: try to help the child in front of you, not a statistical model. There's something out there for any student. Educators have applied the explosion of educational reforms that started in the fifties as if they were meant for all students, the way the traditiional models were. They've failed and abandoned the reforms because they don't fit all students. That's not how they were written. That's the lazy way. Parents should hold your feet to the fire.
4. Parents: educate yourself. The books on alternative education are good reads. I'd recommend any of the education books by Nat Hentoff to start. I'll add more as I can remember them. I know there are more tightly focused educators out there, but I can't remember their names, can't find their books in my house, and can't find them by searching. So if your kid is having trouble, try going to an actual bookstore and asking for allternative education books. Anybody want to help build a bibliography?
5. Everybody: stop treating children like adults. Start treating parents like adults, the responsible adults in students' lives. Children need some support, some time to gain information on how the world works, and a chance to screw up a few times without being jailed. Whatever happened to Principal/parent conversations when problems are beginning? (If anybody goes to jail, it should be the parents--the legally responsible parties. A few applications of that principle might make parents want to be involved.)
6. Parents: slow down. Your jobs are probably not what you'll be remembered for. Make your children what you will want to be remembered for. Try spending some time with your kids. You'll be uncomfortable. They'll be uncomfortable. That's normal.
7. Above all, think of education as psychology, particularly behavior modification. Remember that behavior modification requires some analysis first.
Now that I've said all that, I feel kind of stupid--a single man in his sixties telling parents how to behave. That might belong in the jokes section. I'll let the rest of you decide that.
--lemit
p.s. I wish I could have "Teach Your Children" playing in the background for this.
