Is it possible to have subconcious fear of certain people?

[bochen2]

Every time my parents walk in on me I get "spooked" and my whole body shivers for a moment and shudder uncontrollably for a split second. I don't know why... I didn't have the best of relationships with them when I was a child so could this be subconsciously programed and ingrained into my psyche and I just react to it like a reflex without even thinking or knowing about it?

This only happens with my parents and no one else, especially happens with my father...

It annoys the crap out of me that I can't control or explain this weird behavior and inside fear of some sorts. Is this a reason or cause to this?

[Essay]

Originally Posted by bochen2

...so could this be subconsciously programed and ingrained into my psyche and I just react to it like a reflex without even thinking or knowing about it? Is this [there?] a reason or cause to this?

Yep, ...but not one that you can pinpoint, define, or understand with 100% success. As you said, "...subconsciously programed and ingrained into my psyche."

I won't try to say if this is due to some explicit or implicit neglect/abuse, or if it is most likely from the so very normal "warping" which growing up in a family must almost unavoidably create; but....

IMO, it would be odd if you didn't have some galvanic response when folks enter into your space (consciousness). ...And wondering about it, ...noticing it, makes it that much more forceful in your consciousness (and subconsciousness).

But either way, it is a great motivator. Explore your memories, explore your goals and motives/ethics; read about therapies and theories of psychology. Ask (someday maybe); it's possible your father experienced something similar growing up with his family.

From one perspective, that's a father's job; that is, to make you think (what have I done wrong...what should I do right....), and to motivate you to want your own reality ...and get away from that nagging consciousness.

... & Expect to wait for a few more cycles of development and experience to be in the past before you can more fully understand and integrate these kinds of feelings.

Cheers!
~

p.s.
And realize that you are the eyes of your ancestors hopes, dreams, and struggles; still waiting to see how this will all work out.
What a privilege to be here on Earth, at this exciting time.

[mynah]

bochen2
Some fears that appear irrational may have their origin in very early childhood, at the age when you start to explore and come up against many unknown - and sometimes frightening - things. At that age you may interpret certain actions - punishment, or even teasing when you get things wrong - as much more serious than they had been intended to be. Perhaps you were "caught out" doing something that you were made to feel ashamed of. Try to pinpoint which settings spook you out most, and which least: That might give an indication of the root of your fear.

[Kriminal99]

Originally Posted by bochen2

Every time my parents walk in on me I get "spooked" and my whole body shivers for a moment and shudder uncontrollably for a split second. I don't know why... I didn't have the best of relationships with them when I was a child so could this be subconsciously programed and ingrained into my psyche and I just react to it like a reflex without even thinking or knowing about it?

This only happens with my parents and no one else, especially happens with my father...

It annoys the crap out of me that I can't control or explain this weird behavior and inside fear of some sorts. Is this a reason or cause to this?

Well yeah, but there is nothing mystical about it. That part of your mind just looks at your past experiences and determines what is likely going to occur, and then communicates the results through instinct and emotions.

Defeating it would consist of standing up to your parents with the mindset that you can do whatever you want with your room and their potential judgements are ignorant and meaningless.

[pamela]

Kriminal, he does not have a clue what his parents thoughts, and judgements are, much less that they are meaningless and ignorant.Getting this guy angry and in conflict with his parents is the last thing he should do. Bochen, definitely look deep inside and try to understand where your fear is originating from. Your memories and perceptions from childhood can sometimes be askew.Their view of the relationship with you might be different from yours. Talk to your parents, especially your father, and let them know how you feel. Stay calm and be clear and concise. They may not even be aware that this is going on, so be prepared for hurt feelings. But it is best that you get it out in the open, what ever the outcome. If it goes badly, then I suggest you find someone who can help you work this out.

[cascadiamax]

"Is it possible to have subconscious fear of certain people?"

It is possible. The body has a sense of things that cannot be understood by rational thinking alone. This sense is what gave rise to a phrase like "gut instincts" or "trust your heart."

Hanging around horses is a good way to get in touch with these senses. Hence the term "horse sense."

A lot of growing up is about learning how to feel and how to express feelings. Being able to reason with feelings is the holy grail of consensus - a concurrence in everyone's senses.

Through verbal and other abuses, perceptions and feelings are conditioned to be hidden or avoided. Intellect becomes king, and sensitivity is labeled bad. When feelings show up in a big way later on, they are difficult to deal with, and tend to be destructive on ourselves and others.

There are two good books to go deeper deeper with this.

The Tao of Eqqus

and

The Verbally Abusive Relationship: and How to Recognize It and How to Respond