Why the fuss, after all?
It might be that in all the inhabited solar systems in the galaxy, it's only those pesky Terrans who discriminate in such an arbitrary way.
The Glomeruans don't know what a "planet" is; such a description will make very little sense to them. They only have G'nautzers orbiting their star, and they range from dust-sized particles to one-tenth the size of their star.
There is no such thing as centrifugal force - there is only inertia. By the same token, there is no such thing as "planets". There's only bits of stuff following Kepler's Laws, widely ranging in size.
I am all for reinstating Pluto as a planet, but only if we can reclassify Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune as "failed stars".
Does a ball of rock qualify as a "planet" because it can gravitationally capture and hold a moon? No - a stapler and a paperclip in orbit around the sun will orbit each other, albeit very slowly, and thus qualify to be called a "planetary" system.
But it still screwed with my mnemonic.
